The Widow Project | Survival, Inheritance + the Fight for a Safe Home
A Widow’s Walk: When Home is No Longer Safe
Becoming a widow isn’t just about losing a husband - it’s about losing your place in the world.
Many of the communities we work within are part of the Luhya tribe — one of the largest ethnic groups in Kenya, with over 7 million people. The Luhya people have a rich and beautiful culture - one built on deep community ties, hospitality, and strength. But like in many other tribes, the issue of widowhood carries a weight that is hard to reconcile with these otherwise beautiful traditions.
This isn’t unique to the Luhya. Similar beliefs and practices surrounding widowhood exist in other tribes, including the Maasai and Luo. The challenge isn’t the culture itself - it’s the way widowhood strips a woman of her security and standing within it.
When a woman’s husband dies, grief isn’t the only thing she faces. Almost immediately, questions start swirling around her life, about her - and none of them have easy answers.
Do my friends still trust me, or do they see me as a threat now?
Will my husband’s family protect me - or try to take everything I have left?
Will the man set to “inherit” me respect me — or will he take control of my life and treat my children like they don’t matter?
The pressure is immediate. The fear is real.
Marked by Death
In some tribes, death is seen as something that clings to the widow - like a curse.
Before she’s even allowed to eat with or hug her children, she may be forced to go through specific rituals meant to “cleanse” her of death’s shadow. Some of these practices are invasive, violating her body and leaving her emotionally exposed.
Before and after the rituals, the questions remain.
Will her friends still invite her into their homes, or will they keep their distance, afraid that death might follow?
Will her in-laws support her - or strip her of her rights?
If an inheritor steps in, will he provide for her and the children - or take advantage of her while offering nothing in return?
It’s not just about grief. It’s about survival.
Inheritance and Displacement
Even before she’s processed the loss of her husband, the threat of inheritance hangs over her.
In many cases, a male relative - usually the husband’s brother - will step in to inherit the widow. That means he takes over her home, her possessions, and in some cases, her life.
If she refuses to be inherited, the consequences can be devastating.
I've sat with widows who were pushed out of their homes - forced to the streets because they refused to be treated like property. I've seen women living in makeshift shacks because their husband's family took the house - and everything in it.
Often when the inheritor steps in, it’s not about protection. It’s about taking. Some widows are abused - emotionally, physically, and financially. Their needs ignored. Their children neglected. Their voices silenced.
And if the widow’s husband’s family decides she’s no longer welcome? There’s no safety net. No legal claim. She’s simply left to figure it out alone.
This is Where Pamoja Love Steps In
At Pamoja Love, we refuse to let that be the end of the story.
We’ve met widows who were living on the streets. Women sleeping under crumbling roofs with their children, terrified of the next storm. Women left with nothing because their husband’s family took it all.
Through our Widows’ Home project, we work with local leaders to find widows in the most desperate situations. These are women who have been abandoned, abused, and left without options.
Local churches and community leaders reach out when they see a widow in need. They visit her, listen to her story, and create a plan. What supplies are needed? What labor is required? What will it take to make her feel safe again?
The funds donated through Pamoja Love go directly to providing materials and labor to build a home that is hers - a place where she feels safe.
And it’s not just about shelter - it’s about reclaiming dignity. When a widow has a secure home, it changes everything. She can stop surviving and start rebuilding.
Her children have a safe place to sleep.
She can breathe again, knowing no one will come to take what’s left.
She starts to feel like she belongs again.
Helping Her Children Go to School
But it’s not just the widow who suffers - her children do too.
Losing a father often means losing the ability to pay school fees. For many kids, education stops the moment their father dies. And without school, the cycle of poverty deepens.
That’s why Pamoja Love also provides child sponsorship for widows' children. Sponsorship covers tuition, uniforms, and supplies - making sure that even after the unthinkable happens, her children have a future.
A home gives them safety. Education gives them hope.
Restoring More Than a Home
The impact doesn’t stop at the widow’s front door.
When a widow’s life is restored, it’s not just about having a roof over her head - it’s about reclaiming her place in the community and stepping into the purpose God has for her life.
God sees her. He sees the grief, the rejection, and the fear. But He also sees the strength in her - the creative plans He’s placed in her heart and the gifts He’s equipped her with. He hasn’t forgotten her, and He’s not finished writing her story.
That’s why it’s not enough just to give a widow a home - she needs the tools and opportunities to rebuild her life. Through our business startup program, widows are finding new purpose as they provide for their families.
Some are starting small shops, selling produce or handmade goods. Others are learning tailoring or farming. But the most powerful part? They’re not doing it alone.
We’ve seen widows gather together - supporting each other not just emotionally but practically. They form business co-ops, pooling their resources and knowledge, helping each other succeed. One widow’s success becomes a lifeline for another.
When a widow rises, others rise with her.
And it’s not just about business - it’s about dignity. When a widow earns her own income, she stands taller. She knows her children will be fed, her home will stay secure, and her future isn’t dependent on anyone else's decisions.
We’ve seen God move in these moments - creating pathways where there were none. A woman who once faced shame and uncertainty now becomes a source of strength for others. She gathers with other widows, prays with them, and stands beside them as they build a better future together.
It’s the fulfillment of God’s promise in Jeremiah 29:11:
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
This is restoration.
This is redemption.
This is God rebuilding what was lost - not just a home, but a future.
How You Can Step In
The need is great - but the solution is simple.
✅ Sponsor a Widow’s Home – Give a widow a safe place to live.
✅ Support a Small Business – Help a widow build a source of income and independence.
✅ Educate a Child – Ensure that her children can stay in school and secure a future.
✅ Mentorship Partner – Walk alongside a widow as she steps into leadership.
✅ Pray and Advocate – Spread awareness and stand with these women in faith.
I’ve seen it happen.
I’ve seen women who had nothing stand in front of their community with strength and dignity because someone gave them a place to belong again. I've seen children who were sure they'd never go to school now wearing their uniforms with pride because someone made room for their future.
A home is more than a roof and walls.
Education is more than textbooks and uniforms.
Mentorship is more than advice.
It’s about rebuilding a life that was stripped away.
It’s about showing these women that they matter.
It’s about reminding them that they are seen - and they are not alone.
This is more than survival. This is restoration.
This is justice.
This is hope found in Jesus.
-K
A love that reaches beyond borders: from one widow to another
There was a day she was called to go, to see, to experience and to do. She was headed to Tanzania with a team from the Pacific Northwest. They would be spending two plus weeks in this beautiful land brimming with opportunity to love and serve, working with local partners, reaching out to those who were experiencing deep pain and hardship. Lois understood pain and hardship, she was a widow. She had experienced the pain of loss and she had much love to offer.
As she connected with people walking across the rich soil of the village and billowing through the dusty ground of Maasailand her heart was being deeply impacted. Heartstrings were developing, strings that would hold the memories tight to her heart over a decade later.
A little over ten years later Lois would hear of another heartbreaking story of a widow from her friends, the local leaders that she had worked with earlier in Tanzania. They shared the following: “She is called Ruth, her husband died 5 years ago, when she was with child. She has four children.” After the death of her husband there was the usual traditional option of being inherited by force, that his family was pressing her for, a family member could take her as his own, but Ruth refused. This was more than she could imagine, which forced her to remain living in a home that was falling apart and leaking. When Lois read this she knew the time is NOW, she needed to do something.
So what did she do? She joined the Widow’s Home Building Projects that the local partners run and funded a home for this family. The cost typically runs around $650 and that provides the basics for labor and the main structure, then the community comes together to help with the rest building the walls, etc.
Since the time of the home being built a neighbor to the widow was talking to our partners about the impact love in action makes. He said “ It’s not Jesus alone that raises people from death, we still have people on earth raising other people.” (Of course we recognize that he is saying Jesus is still using people to reach out in love and make a great impact in the life of another. To God be the glory! )
But for this kind of raising to happen it does take a willingness and action of people coming together. Lois still has more she would like to do, more love to share, would you like to be a part of this story?
The widow in this story still needs a concrete floor, which runs about $500, and furniture to house the home with practical items like a bed, a couch, table, etc. This runs around $400-750 depending on the family’s specific needs. Of course, there are many more widows and vulnerable families in need that you can help to build a safe shelter for, a home. Like Lois, we would LOVE to have you join us in our mission to make HOPE loud for those hurting in Tanzania and Kenya. There are a few ways to join the movement:
1. You can become a Pamoja Love Dream Team Member and create a project of your own to fundraise for.
2. you can join Lois in her mission to continue raising funds for Ruth’s home or the home of others in need. You will find the link below to donate.
If you have any questions, or are eager to become a Dream Team Member, you can shoot us an email at hello@pamoja.love
God Protects Us
A song of the stairway
I look up to the mountains and hills, longing for God’s help.
But then I realize that our true help and protection
is only from the Lord, our Creator who made the heavens and the earth.
He will guard and guide me, never letting me stumble or fall.
God is my keeper; he will never forget nor ignore me.
He will never slumber nor sleep; he is the Guardian-God for his people, Israel.
Yahweh himself will watch over you; he’s always at your side to shelter you safely in his presence.
He’s protecting you from all danger both day and night.
He will keep you from every form of evil or calamity as he continuously watches over you.
You will be guarded by God himself.
You will be safe when you leave your home, and safely you will return.
He will protect you now, and he’ll protect you forevermore!
PSALM 121 The Passion Translation
Let's CELEBRATE! The Building Container Project | Kibera Slum
It’s time to CELEBRATE God’s goodness. Take a look at what he has been up to the last few years. This container project began in 2019 just before the world seemed to turn upside down. The dream was to put in these containers and modify them into a solid metal building that would house a medical clinic, technology center, and library for the children of Saviour King School in Kibera Slum, as well as house a training center for the Lily Among Thorns young mama’s empowerment group.
When the world seemed like it might be slowing down, God did what only God can do… stir the hearts of his people and make things happen. And He did just that!
And look at it standing tall and proud today! It serves over 500 children and families in Kibera Slum. It will help to expand their learning in the necessary technology skills they will need to reach their dreams. These kids are working hard for the careers they dream to acquire one day, and now they have a much better chance. Is this not amazing? This is reason to CHEER! Let’s clap and shout.
Now, we just need to stock it with library books, supplies, and resources. We have a few ways you can help with this. 1. Purchasing the bookmark in the store help to purchase new books for the library. 2. You can click the donate button below to give towards this project.
Together we can make a difference!
Let's make HOPE loud. Where Pain finds Purpose, Creative Gifts that Give.
Do you know what it feels like to have your kids go hungry? I mean, haven’t eaten for a couple of days hungry? How about thirsty? And again, not just thirsty but thirsty for a few days, thirsty. For many, this is hard to imagine, for many others, it’s not. There are things we can do.
And what about having some limitations due to accidents, injuries + disabilities? Having some uncertainty of how to provide the basics for your family.
I have one. What about being a widow and having your home in disrepair. Unable of how to handle it and the 10,000 other things your spouse was overseeing. This added on top of your heavy weight of grief. I actually know this one.
Yes, some of us can resonate more with certain needs due to our own personal experiences. That is exactly why we have provided an array of giving areas because we KNOW what a difference it makes in your own life when you can pour out a little love into an area where you were hurt. This is where PAIN finds PURPOSE.
So let’s see which one pulls on your heartstrings, or reminds you of a loved one. Because these make FABULOUS Christmas gifts for the hard to buy for. And we have a terrific one for a Teachers appreciation gift.
Just click on the image and it will take you to our giving catalog where you can donate towards any of these projects.
It's Emi's Birthday - Let's Celebrate with a Dance Team Campaign for Africa!
We would like to introduce you to Emi. She is one amazing human! We had the privilege of having her join us on our recent Outreach Trip to Africa this last month and BOY was she a joy to have along.
This girl is a shining light to anyone who comes near her. It was so inspiring to watch her in action as she loved on whoever she came in contact with. She made the best out of every hard situation, even slopping mud became a joy-fest.
Watching her in action we knew she was a world-changer! And look at her now, back just one week and making her birthday an opportunity to gather people alongside her to reach out to the world with a little more love. She has chosen to BRING MORE DANCING by asking her friends and family to join her in raising funds for the GoEden Kids Dance Team of Garden of Eden Children’s Home located just outside of Nairobi, Kenya.
We love you Emi and are SO PROUD OF YOU! Thank you for making a difference!
A note from Emi:
“Hi y’all! For my birthday, instead of asking for presents, I wanted to bless kids around the world. I’m a dancer and when I was in Africa, I learned how important dance was to them. So, as my birthday present, I call you to donate towards the Garden of Eden Dance team. I’ve met these kids personally and they all have big hearts and groovy dance moves. Thank you in advance!”
Sincerely,
Emiline Hansen
Teachers Helping Teachers Around the World
Kibera is the largest slum in all of Africa, second largest slum in the world. It is about one mile square with an estimated 1 million people living within it. If you are one who lives on a plot of land this could be very hard to imagine. I’ll try to help you here, the average home is 12ft x 12ft, built with mud walls, a corrugated tin roof, and dirt or concrete floors. Some of these homes have a partition to create two living spaces within them. They do not have running water, plumbing of any kind, and many do not have electricity. And the shanties often house 8 or more people with many of them sleeping on the floor.
Kibera is filled with story, just like everywhere else: tight-knit families, broken relationships, joy, challenges, and dreams of a better life. However, the biggest struggle is probably finding an affordable wage to provide for your family. And with that kind of struggle you find all kinds of coping mechanisms, numbing agents, and desperate, risky, options to provide just enough for that day.
We are so thankful to work alongside local partners who understand what it is like to live here, and who are taking steps to help bring the change people are looking for. Thomas and Beatrice Omolo are bringing hope, dreams and opportunity to the next generation of Kibera. They founded a school in 2008 with 100 students attending, they now have nearly 600. These children are earning an excellent education but let’s not stop there. When families enroll their kids at Saviour King they are cared about and loved on as a whole unit. How could one couple possibly do this for 600 students? Well, they couldn’t. But the teachers, they are the ones carrying out the mission on a daily basis.
These teachers at Saviour King Ed. Ctr. don't just teach these children, they choose to live in their neighborhoods and do life with them. They daily pour their hearts and lives into the well being of these precious children and their families.
So Maddy, one of the Pamoja Love Dream Team Members, came up with a brilliant idea in October as she was in Kibera walking the school grounds and witnessing the teachers loving on the kiddos. She dreamed up the idea of the Teachers for Teachers Project. A project that a school, or a group of friends, could join hands to make a global impact with. We know teachers understand the joys and challenges that come with teaching, and then to imagine the extra demands put on these teachers when parents are struggling to provide the basics like food, medical care, etc.
But we can send them some encouragement and remind them they are loved and cared about. Every $250 donation will provide 5 teachers with a Christmas meal package for their families along with a personal gift. This will be such a huge encouragement to them.
We have made this giving opportunity super easy. You can go to our giving catalog page online and select Teachers for Teachers. Or if you want to each give individually to one teacher you can go to the “Donate” tab and make a $50 donation with a comment listing “Teachers for Teachers”.
We hope you will share this giving opportunity with people you know that would have a heart for It.
Click here to visit the Giving Catalog Page
Together we can make a difference.
-Pamoja Love